It’s autumn now and with the change of the leaves, a change in wardrobe is in order. So I went to the Macy’s sale with the intention to buy some boots for fall. Some cute ones that I could wear with jeans or skirts all winter. I asked the (very) young guy working there if I could see several pairs of boots in a size 7, and he replied, “We don’t have any of our wide-legged boots in yet.”
Now I realize I’m twenty pounds overweight (sixty-five if I wanted to be a super model, but who’s counting?). However, I am (usually) a respectable size twelve, so I didn’t really think a comment of that nature was called for. I thought about asking him, “Do I look that wide to you?” But then I realized I probably didn’t want to know the answer, so I let it go.
I came home without boots (yes, my calves were too big... thank you for not noticing). And the next day I had to go on a field trip with my kid’s school. This is when I found out that I don’t fit into any of my winter pants. I have an assortment of jeans sizes 8 to 12 and I couldn’t button any of them. I could button the twelves if I put on a girdle… I mean, ahem, a “body slimmer.” But really, who’s going to be stuffed into one of those damn things just to go on a field trip? I know I’m not. So I had to fall back on that old frumpy housewife stand by, sweat pants.
It was then that I decided I’d better do something about this, because, having like fifteen pairs of jeans already, I can’t really justify buying new ones. Not to mention, who wants to shop for bigger clothes? But then I don’t have any of those cute embroidered ones, so maybe…. No! I can’t. I decided to try a couple of days eating nothing but coffee and Diet Coke (I put cream in my coffee so I got some calories) and I did lose two pounds in two days. But then, nothing for a few days and I got discouraged. If you’ve ever dieted before, I don’t have to tell you how many calories I consumed at the point of “discouragement,” and I immediately put back on the two pounds I’d lost.
In the end I realized I’d have to get out the big guns. Desperate times call for desperate measures, so I finally dragged my wide self out of bed and onto the treadmill. When all else fails, I hear exercise is a good way to get in shape.
Copyrigt 2005. Staci Schoff. All Rights Reserved.